


Quitting time

by KS_Claw



Category: Big Hero 6, Brave (2012), Frozen - Fandom, How to Train Your Dragon (Movies), Rise of the Guardians (2012), tangled - Fandom
Genre: Gen, Jack and Hiccup are so done, Just here to make fun of things, Sequel to my other parody fic, teeny bit of mention of Megamind o3o
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-08
Updated: 2014-11-08
Packaged: 2018-02-24 14:29:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2584697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KS_Claw/pseuds/KS_Claw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pitch is waiting for Jack at the Poisoned Apple, and is surprised when Jack brings along a guest.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Quitting time

**Author's Note:**

> Short of the long. I got bored, and decided to write out a sequel to my parody fic, Misdirection, while at the same time poking fun at the big hype Big Hero 6 is. And before you ask, no I haven’t seen it yet and I don’t plan to. This is just a story I’ve written for fun, so save your flames for something important.
> 
> More notes is at the end of the story

It was Friday night at the Poisoned Apple. This meant it was special drinks night, and it had somehow become one of Pitch Blacks favourite pastimes. It used to be due to how the drinks became cheaper, and thereby perfect for when needing to drown your anger over how unfair some things were in canon (good grief how he had gotten blitzed after the fifth of November in 2013*), but in recent times, it had more been because Jack Frost had begun to accompany him and made a game out of making new drinks, naming them and then trying to see how drunk you could get from them.  
  
Funny how some things turned out when you made friends outside of canon.  
  
But tonight, as it would turn out, would be a bit of a different case. For one thing, Jack was late. As flighty as he could be, Jack was never late. And Pitch had almost given into the temptation to go out and look for him (not because he was worried or anything), when the door swung open and a familiar hoodieclad figure came in.  
  
"Jack!" Pitch exclaimed, hiding his relief behind a mask of irritation. "It’s about time you showed up!"  
  
"Sorry _'mom'._ " The winterspirit grumbled. "Had a bit of a crisis. Also, I brought a friend. We both need something strong."  
  
Pitch raised a hairless brow, before looking at the figure who had followed Jack inside. He was almost a head taller than Jack and clad in an outfit that looked like armor as well as some sort of riding suit. He was also followed by a very familiar black dragon, that paused in the doorway, when the Ugly Stepsister looked up from cleaning a glass, and scowled.  
  
"Is ‘e housebroken?" She demanded to know, and the helmet clad figure paused awkwardly, before it pulled off the helmet to reveal a slightly bewildered, freckled brunette,  
  
"Toothless? Uh, yeah, he’s- he doesn’t drag mud in or anything."  
  
The Stepsister snorted, though she smirked as she gave the lad a slow once-over, clearly liking what she saw, before turning grim again. “Good. I just washed the floor. Just keep yerselves outta trouble.” With that, she went back to her work, leaving the young man stuttering an affirmative, while his dragon quickly slinked inside.  
  
Jack and Pitch had been watching the whole exchange, and the Boogeyman raised a brow in wry amusement, as the rider made his way over to them.  
  
"Well now, someone has settled nicely into their updated canon." He said with a grin, as he looked over Hiccup. "I did hear things from Jack, but seeing it with my own eyes…"  
  
On any other night, he suspected that the young dragon rider would have reacted in a more canon way, such as slight floundering or huffy sassy replies.  
  
Instead, he only received two rather exasperated glowers, from Jack as well as Hiccup, and an irritable snort from Toothless, the dragon having curled up under the nearest table.  
  
"Okay. Joking aside," Pitch said in a placating way. "You two needed something strong. Any particular kind of strong?"  
  
Hiccup sighed and promptly put his head on the bar  
  
"How about ‘anything that can help me forget the past six months?’" He groaned.  
  
Pitch looked to Jack, who shrugged.  
  
"White Russian sounds good."  
  
"We’ll take three, please." Pitch told the Ugly Stepsister, who simply nodded and went to get their orders. Pitch on his part turned towards the other two.  
  
“Alright, Grim and Grimmer.” He said calmly, “what happened?”  
  
“ _We quit!_ ” They both replied as one, both grimacing as if they didn’t really want to talk about it. But, Pitch thought, Jack would not have brought Hiccup here, if that had been the case. And considering the enmity from one of their last encounters, Pitch felt just a bit entitled.  
  
Still, he took things calmly, giving them a look.  
  
“…And would you care to elaborate?”  
  
“Have you heard about the new kid that’s coming?” Jack asked, “the kid with the robot?”  
  
“Disney born, has his own group of friends and yet they insist…” Hiccup grumbled, before he quickly grabbed his drink as it arrived and began to down it. Jack patted him comfortingly on the shoulder.  
  
“Let’s start over.” Pitch said calmly. “Because I have no idea what you’re talking about.”  
  
Jack huffed. “Okay, so it all started when Hiccup and I had just finished the last idea that the girls had come up with for our ‘logo’…”  
————  
  
_“Rise of the Brave Frozen Tangled Dragons”_ read the sign. Part of it was in stone, part of it was in wood, and the rest was carved out of ice. It had been hard work, as Jack and Elsa’s ice powers had been conflicting against one another (not that it was anyone’s real fault. Jack’s was natural while Elsa’s was magic, and that made a huge difference, but they had finally settled when Jack made the Rise of, while Elsa had made the Frozen part of the logo).  
  
“So what do you guys think?” Jack said, grinning a bit. “Looking good, huh?”  
  
The ladies of the group, consisting of Merida, Rapunzel and now Elsa and Anna, were looking thoughtfully at the sign. Rapunzel was smiling at Jack’s enthusiasm, while Merida was frowning. Elsa herself looked pleased, but probably because of how her powers had been used for something creative, while Anna seemed to be sharing Merida’s frown.  
  
“I think it looks really nice.” Rapunzel said warmly, clasping her hands in front of her. Elsa gave a regal nod in agreement.  
  
“It does, especially since we managed to make the ice behave.” She said.  
  
Hiccup however, was frowning.  
  
“So what’s wrong?”  
  
“Wrong?” Rapunzel asked with a blink. “I don’t think anything’s wrong. Why? Should something be wrong?”  
  
Jack however, started to frown as well. “…Punzie, you’re doing that thing.” He said. “The one where you’re trying to cover something up. And you too, Merida. What’s up?”  
  
“Well…” Merida said slowly, “we’re just thinking…”  
  
“It needs metal!” Anna exclaimed, making the others turn to look at her. “I mean,” she then said, biting her lower lip with an awkward grin. “Doesn’t it… look like it could use metal?”  
  
“It’s already got metal.” Jack said confused, looking up at the logo. “It’s part of the Dragon logo.”  
  
“I know, but… I mean in a more _MODERN_ way!” Anna replied, bouncing lightly on the spot. “Like, more shiny, and newer looking! And more red!”  
  
———-  
  
“ _'More red.'_ ” Pitch said drily. “Really? That was the best way she could bring it up?”  
  
“Anna is not really good at that…” Jack wavered, before he grimaced. “Okay, I’ll say it, she’s not good at _breaking the ice_ that way.” He then finished, ignoring the amused snickers from the other two. “But yeah, that’s how she opened the subject. And it…” He sighed, “ _snowballed_ from there.”  
———  
  
Hiccup and Jack glanced at each other, before they frowned and looked to the girls. Elsa, to her credit, was looking slightly embarrassed at her sister’s behavior, while Merida looked amused. Rapunzel however, had noticed Jack and Hiccup’s looks, and cleared her throat carefully.  
  
“It’s just… You’ve heard about the new movie that’s coming out, right?” She asked.  
  
“Ah, ye migh’ as well say it, Punzie.” Merida snorted. “There’s a new kid in town, an’ we girls thought we’d like t’ have him join the group! We already sent him an invitation letter, an’ judgin’ from the reply, he liked the idea.”  
  
Jack and Hiccup looked to the girls, then to each other with a frown.  
  
“New kid.” Jack said slowly. “You mean Big Hero 6?”  
  
“That would be the one.” Elsa agreed. “We wrote to him of each of our skills, and achievements, and he sounded quite enthusiastic about joining, despite how he works with technology, rather than magic.”  
  
“But we told 'im that it was no’ a problem.” Merida replied with a grin, “seein’ as we got Hiccup who makes all kinds of things in his own way, and without even needin’ whatever modern-age _bourach*_ he might be usin’.”  
  
“And his companion almost looks like a _snowman!_ ” Anna put in enthusiastically. “And he seems so nice and-”  
  
“Whoa whoa whoa _whoa!_ ” Jack exclaimed. “Just a minute here!” He grimaced at that, looking to the girls with a slight scowl. “Let me get this straight… So there’s a new movie, and it’s got a new kid who is like, a scientist or something, right?”  
  
“Right.” Rapunzel said with a nod.  
  
“He’s got a robot companion, and you’ve written to him about how you’d like him to join the group as well, yes?” Hiccup asked, to which Merida nodded.  
  
“And he’s happy about that idea. Because you’ve written to him, about all of us.” Jack then said, looking to Elsa, who frowned, but then nodded.  
  
“So here’s the question…” Hiccup said slowly. “How come you have talked to him about _us_ … but you haven’t talked to us about _him?_ ”  
  
There was a long, awkward silence.  
———-  
  
“Whoops.” Pitch said calmly. “Got a bit too eager?”  
  
“Like you wouldn’t believe.” Hiccup grumbled, glaring down into his half-finished White Russian. “And it only got worse after that.”  
  
“Oh Man in the Moon, don’t remind me.” Jack groaned, hiding his face in his arms. Toothless grumbled gently, nuzzling his shoulder in comfort.  
  
“So then what happened?” Pitch asked, motioning for the Ugly Stepsister to bring them another round.  
  
“What else?” Hiccup sighed. “They tried to talk us into liking the idea.”  
  
———-  
  
_“Rise of the Brave Tangled Frozen Big Hero Dragons.”_ Jack said darkly. “You can’t be serious.”  
  
“But you all have so much in common!” Anna exclaimed. “Like Jack, you and he both wear hoodies!”  
  
“And Hiccup, he’s an _inventor!_ ” Rapunzel added, “and he rides on Baymax too like you ride on Toothless!”  
  
“An’ on top of it, he c’n fight!” Merida added. “He’s makin’ himself a superhero team in his movie!”  
  
“Girls. _Girls!_ ” Elsa suddenly exclaimed in a stern tone. “Calm down!” She frowned, looking to Hiccup and Jack, who were not looking too happy about their enthusiasm.  
  
“I thought you knew.” She then said. Jack on his part grimaced, running his fingers through his hair in frustration.  
  
“It’s like the thing with Pitch all over again…*” He grumbled under his breath, before he began to walk away. Hiccup was frowning, looking hard at the four women.  
  
“We might have a lot in common,” he told them, “but that doesn’t make it right, that you decided on things without asking us first.” He began to follow Jack, with Tooth trotting after him, the dragon grumbling quietly as they heard Merida scoff and mutter something behind them. There was no doubt that Jack’s comment had stung, but Hiccup didn’t look back to see their reactions.  
  
————  
  
“I can’t say I blame you for that reaction.” Pitch said thoughtfully. “I mean, yet another Disney kid, plus his companion, and all his friends if he brings them… that’s bound to get a bit more crowded.”  
  
“Not to mention that Jack and I were already outnumbered.” Hiccup grumbled. “So Jack and I decided to resign. Without telling the girls to their face.”  
  
“And then we went and packed our gear, which thankfully didn’t take much.” Jack said with a sigh. “Most of it was Hiccup’s and we went to take that back to Berk, before we went here. Which is why we’re late. Oh, and we’ve been avoiding the others’ places, which takes a bit of rerouting when you’ve forgotten to bring a snow globe.”  
  
“Fair enough.” Pitch said with a slow nod. “So what are you going to do now?”  
  
“Well, either someone will come up with a ridiculous way for the girls to apologize…*” Jack grumbled, “or Hiccup and I will just be forgotten by everyone else.”  
  
Pitch raised a hairless brow.  
  
“You do realize that crossovers do not have to be across companies, right? I mean… you are part of Dreamworks. And while our company is only 20 years old, we still have our own menagerie that you can work with.”  
  
“But we haven’t done well…” Jack groused. “You know it yourself.”  
  
“Does it really matter? We’re still good quality, even if there are idiots out there, who refuse to see it.” Pitch replied darkly. “I mean… you do remember where we are, right?” He glanced meaningfully towards the Ugly Stepsister and Captain Hook, who was warming up on the piano.  
  
Jack was quiet, but Hiccup nodded slowly. “Yeah… I see what you mean.” He told Pitch, before pulling Jack into a one-armed hug. “We’ll be fine. We still got each other too, right Jack?”  
  
“Don’t let the shippers hear that.” Pitch said, and snickered when it made the two males quickly pulled away from one another with awkward glances.  
  
“Joking aside, I know some people who wouldn’t mind meeting you. In fact, they’ve been hoping to talk with you for a while now.” Pitch said. “They just didn’t know how to approach you, with you being so occupied with the ladies.”  
  
Jack snorted and rolled his eyes, but he and Hiccup still looked curiously at the Boogeyman, who smirked and learned forward in an almost conspiring manner.  
  
“Ever been to a place called Metrocity?*”

**Author's Note:**

> \-----
> 
> EXTRA NOTES
> 
> 1) November 5th in 2013 was when the fourth book in the Guardians of Childhood series, "Sandman and the War of Dreams" was published. For those who have not read the book, it was not quite what the fandom expected.
> 
> 2) Bourach - Scottish for a small hill or mound, or slang for "disorganized heap or mass"
> 
> 3) Yeah, you can guess. Hint for my other parody fic, Misdirection o3o
> 
> 4) Don't look at me, I'm not gonna write it.
> 
> 5) If you don't know what that's a reference to, then shame on you (not really, but I do recommend "Megamind")


End file.
